Subject: Re: Frengi (sp?) Laws for business
References: <2rpfmm$t1p@usenet.INS.CWRU.Edu>

                  =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-   =-=-=-=
                  THE RULE$ OF ACQUI$ITION - FERENGI
                  =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-   =-=-=-=
 
[You can distribute this list as you wish, as long as you don't modify it!]
 
Compiled by.......: Martin Goulet (gouletm@JSP.UMontreal.CA)
Last updated......: May 23, 1994
New rules.........: 285 (The collaborator)
 
 
1.      Once you have their money, you never give it back.
        [Rom, "The Nagus"]
 
3.      Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.
        [Quark, "The Maquis Part II"]
 
6.      Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
        [Zek, "The Nagus"]
 
7.      Keep your ears open.
        [Odo, "Hands of the prophet"]
 
9.      Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.
        [Nog, "The Storyteller"]
 
16.     A deal is a deal.
        [Quark, "Melora"]
 
21.     Never place friendship above profit.
        [Quark, "Rules of acquisition"]
 
22.     A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
        [Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
 
31.     Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother.
        [Quark, "The siege"]
 
33.     It never hurts to suck up to the boss.
        [Quark & Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
 
47.     Never trust anyone whose suit is nicer than your own.
        [Quark, "Rivals"]
 
48.     The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife.
        [Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
 
57.     Good customers are as rare as latinum, treasure them.
        [Quark, "Armageddon game"]
 
59.     Free advice is seldom cheap.
        [Quark, "Rules of acquisition"]
 
62.     The riskier the road, the greater the profit.
        [Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
 
76.     Every once in a while declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your
        enemies.
        [Quark, "The homecoming"]
 
103.    Sleep can interfere .... [cut off]
        [Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
 
109.    Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack.
        [Quark, "Rivals"]
 
112.    Never have sex with the boss' sister.
        [Quark, "Playing God"]
 
139.    Wives serve, brothers inherit.
        [Odo, "Necessary evil"]
 
194.    It's always good business to know about new customers before they
        walk in your door. [Quark wasn't sure of the number of this one]
        [Quark, "Whispers"]
 
214.    Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach.
        [Quark, "The Maquis Part I"]
 
285.    No good deed ever goes unpunished.
        [Quark, "The collaborator"]
 
 
                                 =-=-=-=-=
                                   NOTES
                                 =-=-=-=-=
 
* In the TNG episode "Bloodlines", cmdr. Riker mentions that the
  Ferengi governement is debating an amendment to the Rules of Acquisition.
  (stardate 47829.1)
 
* We know from Quark (The Maquis Part I) and from Pel (Rules of acquisition)
  that there are 285 rules of acquisition.
 
* Quark mentionned rule #223 in "Profit and Loss".
 
* Pel may have invented what she said from the rule #103


-- 
/vsuhocki@cbnewsm.cb.att.com|Disclaimer: My opinions are my own, and    \
|attbl!cbnewsm!vsuhocki     |not affiliated, or related to my employer's| 
\PGP key available by finger|-------------------------------------v1.4--/ 

